IT Girls Global Success Forum

You are what ever you choose to be

Imagine you are at a cocktail party.

Would you simply walk up to someone you've never met before and begin the conversation with "Hi, let's be friends"? Probably not.

I was recently at a large event where everyone was wearing name tags. At the end of the evening, as everyone was getting ready to leave, I came face to face with a man I'd never met before in my life. He took a quick look at my name tag, avoided eye contact, thrust his business card into my jacket pocket and said:
"Hey Patrick! If you ever need bubble-wrap give me call. My company makes bubble-wrap and things are always 'popping' over at our place!"

And then he was gone!

WHAT??? I stood in complete disbelief and watched him do the same thing to 10 other people as he was scurrying out of the venue. Not once did he engage them in conversation or even ask for their business card.

That's how I feel about receiving "friend requests" from people who have never communicated with me. It's like jamming your business card in my pocket as you rush past me with a handful of cards trying to "make friends". Or it's like walking up to someone and opening the conversation with "Hi, let's be friends."

Here are my suggestions for a more effective way to network online:

1. Take a moment to read the person's profile page and some of their posts. See what groups they belong to. You're doing this to look for common interests. If you don't share any interests, then what value is there in listing them as a "friend"?

2. Send a message to the person introducing yourself and explaining the common interest factor. You can do this by offering a comment on something from the person's profile page or one of their posts. This simply shows that you're interested in them. And NOTHING makes you more interesting to others than showing that you are interested in them.

3. Once you've heard back from them, then you might consider making a friend request. If they accept, then you'll have the satisfaction of knowing that you've made a quality relationship!

And just for the record... I DON'T need any bubble wrap!

-Patrick

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3 Comments

Sunny Cervantes Comment by Sunny Cervantes on October 22, 2007 at 2:11am
I usually accept friend/contact requests on any of the social networking platforms I'm a member of. But, when there's no regular interaction between us after some time, I delete them from my list. Sometimes, I get violent reactions from those I've deleted. I explain and add them again. If things don't improve, they are deleted forever.

If we don't have any direct interaction between us, you're just littering my profile page. :(
Krissy Comment by Krissy on October 5, 2007 at 4:21pm
101 ways to make bubble wrap an indispensible part of your life :-)
Krissy Comment by Krissy on October 5, 2007 at 4:20pm
I don't know Patrick, by the furtive way the guy was behaving, perhaps there are more uses for bubble wrap than you think :-)

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